untitled

Source of all pain is yourself
You can self inflict before you can even think
Don’t blink, it hits you faster that a motherfucker
Damn that pain, and all you can do is blame.. yourself
Self loathing, scolding your inner self for being foolish,
Living on a simple wish to accomplish something incredible
But then that obstacle creates a debacle that you can barely tackle
I think I might just snap, crackle, pop under the pressure, unless you can reassure,
That the person in me is not to blame but the extremities and factors that together we can barely measure are the wrongful culprits,
Fuck that shit, it almost seems convincing, thinking I can go through life carefree and not wincing or flinching at the slightest digression, that is my cue to change course, realign myself to conform to your liking, fuck you society, why must I hate myself every second just for a change of pace or a breath of fresh air which comes at your convenience, conform to your own version of civil obedience,
I think change is overrated, I mean look at hip hop, it seems like the culture has downgraded, to a completely diluted version of itself which continues to be degraded, please excuse me for not being elated at hip hops state of being jaded, that is a good example of self inflicted pain, an inner flood of uncontrollable rain awaiting for that glimmer of hope, a piercing sun ray, but all you see is just the symptoms of an implosion on its way, a countdown to a nerve wrecking detonation, and see the funny thing is that you will be telling yourself later, is that you are the one in control of the detonator, finger on the button, or the trigger just waiting for that moment for that exact same finger to get a little bit itchy,
Push the button, squeeze that trigger, aching soul, pleasing to the haters, the critics the masses who think all you are is a minority in their demographic, don’t judge me you exploiting bastards just cause the people of the underground think in an unorthodox manner which is borderline erratic,
Stop abusing what you’re on the brink of losing, your mind, your soul, your sanity,
Release the razor blade, have a sense of clarity, to self inflict is to fall into the morbid vanity of this society only going without a fight, giving in quietly,
Self inflict, my inner pain is not enough to sustain, to look at life from behind a window pane,
Your choice if you like to live mundane, refrain to actually live,
Allowing yourself to lock up like a vault, but like I said its entirely our fault, to give in to emotional self mutilation that squanders the opportunity to no longer flounder,
Held breathless in a struggle that’s endless, gasping for air in the middle of a tempest,
Pain pulsates in my veins, embedding a trace of soreness in my brain, making the screams that build up in my chest hard to contain,
I have allowed myself to be victimized,
Self sodomized my a society that has cut me off like a cock that has been circumcised,
Where do I find my place, in a world where there is no longer a face,
Where music has no melody, where skin in no longer susceptible to being tangible and the food has no taste, where the caterpillar is permanently encased,
But aimlessly we will depict a tale of derelicts,
Who long for an alternative to no longer self inflict.